Oscar pics fun!!!

I try to have a little
fun with all of the red carpet pictures at the Oscars every other
year, and since I’m still single and bored these days, I decided to
give it another go. If you simply want to gaze at the very lovely
ladies and handsome gentlemen pictures from last evening, CLICK
HERE and head on over to MovieHotties.com for a TON of
pictures from the red carpet, the behind-the-scenes and eventually
even the parties. Aaaaaah yes, the parties, the glitz, the
glamour…the handjobs. I wish I was in showbiz, man. Sigh.

Oscar Pics Fun: 2006
/ 2004
/ 2003

Spider-Man 8…when Peter Parker fights the bottle!!!

I know this might be a little "cliche" to say on this
site, but honestly folks, how can anyone look at Viggo Mortensen’s
awesome beard and NOT want to build a hut in it?? I mean, even just
for the summertimes, you know? Great man…even greater beard!!

No jokes here, just a really great looking lady!!

And speaking of great looking ladies, what the hell’s Javier Bardem
doing running after Matt Damon, Matthew McConaughey and Tom Cruise’s
leftovers? (i.e. Penelope Cruz) Dude’s got it going on!! Move on,
friend-o!

This type of picture is always difficult on me because I’m never
sure who to fantasize about first: the gorgeous Diane Lane or the
studly Josh Brolin. And I’m not even gay, man!!!

Speaking of ‘being gay", I think it goes without saying that had
I been gay, I would give this man a "clean handjob".
In fact, you know what…this dude is just too charismatic…I’ll
give him hand even as a hetero!!!

I swear this chick has given me a lapdance before….

Every year, I make a joke about Cameron Diaz either being on coke or
looking skanky, but this year, with the picture above in play, I
think we can all agree that I can make no such distinction: she’s on
coke and skanky this time around! WHAT THE EFF?? Get back
together with Timberlake, girlfriend…boyfriend was keeping you
young.

The stubbly beard, the flowing hair, the great looks…we get it,
dude…you’re BETTER than us…now f*ck off already!!

Even with his hair hanging in front of his face, Johnny Depp remains
the best looking (and coolest) man on the face of this planet, and
perhaps on a few other planets as well…depending on how they gauge
"looks", of course.

Donnie f*ckin’ Osmond was at the Oscars?? Straight up, guys…how
does this happen? I mean…c’mon!!!!

Remember this chick? She won "American Idol" or some shit,
then won an Academy Award for "Best Supporting Actress"
last year and since then…well, since then…. Well okay, she
hasn’t done SHITE since then, but at least she looks good in
her mumu dress above, right? Right?!?!

Just like last year’s winner for "Best Actress", Marion
Cotillard apparently isn’t just an amazing actress, but…BABY’S GOT
BACK!! Appelle moi chez moi!

Now either Nicole Kidman is really, really tall or she just digs on
short guys. Whatever the case, once this "Urban" thing
passes, gimme a call, Kid…I’m a shrimp (and I don’t mean just
in my pants!)

I ain’t much of a "fashion connaisseur", I mean…my idea
of dressing up is wearing a WHITE shirt with my BLACK pants, but is
it really a good idea to wear an ultra-red dress on an ultra-red
carpet? I don’t know. Then again, neither of these hot blondes would
walk across the street to spit on my hair, were it on fire, so God
knows my words don’t mean much here.

Go Canada!!! (Sarah Polley representin’)

Never in my lifetime did I think that I would see the day that I
would state (without kidding) that a man wearing two pirates
earrings would ever look even remotely "cool", but
f*ck me sideways, Mr. Lewis, you are cool and continue to be
cool, with or without the earrings. Wow. And check out that
bed of hair. I’d drink that milkshake.

First Donnie f*ckin’ Osmond, now this chick from that
"Dancing" show??? What the eff is going on at these
Oscars? The next thing you know, JoBlo.com will be covering the red
carpet. Seriously though…give us the creds, man…we’ll do a super
job, yo!!

I love the Rock, and I love Dwayne Johnson, but something about this
picture above is just….scary. His mouth looks like it’s taking up
3/4 of his face. Great man though.

Again, no joke to make here, folks…just a very good looking woman.
Audrey Hepburn-esque. I said it. Call me!

That’s right, that’s right…they bad, they bad! Seth Rogen and
Jonah Hill hit the red carpet with babes in tow and give geeks
worldwide hope of making it there one day as well (as long as they
have talent like the two gents, of course).