All aboard the reboot space shuttle for Doom 3D

Universal is heading back to Mars for another crack at DOOM, the 2005 video game adaptation best known for making The Rock do fourteen kids movies afterward to pay penance for his involvement.

It seems like a very strange property to resurrect, as most moviegoers have nothing but negative associations from the first film, and I don’t think they’d be too eager to try it out again.

But according to What’s Playing, Universal has been impressed with how will Paramount’s GI JOE did ($300M on a $175M budget), and somehow, for reasons unknown to me, that translates into giving DOOM another go. I guess they’re both…licensed properties I enjoyed when I was eight?

Oh and naturally, now that 3D is currently shoved halfway down our throats, the film will capitalize on the trend and bring us CGI monster and gunplay action in a new dimension totally worth the 50% ticket price increase.

You know, I’m the biggest proponent of someone finally making a video game movie good, but this is like someone advocating for women’s rights posing with her legs spread in Penthouse, and it’s just going to set the movement back even further.