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Face-Off: Friday the 13th Part VI Vs. Friday the 13th Part VII

Sep. 16, 2013by: Mike Catalano
Well, holy hand grenade! I sure was blown away by the number of readers that disagreed with our last Face-Off! Everyone thought that The Descent should have bested Pitch Black and you know what? I totally agree with ya! The Descent is one of my faves, yet if you look at the categorical comparison, it still makes sense how Pitch scored the upset. Regardless, it was fun reading all the comments so keep that shit up!

Now, with the spirit of this past Friday the 13th still in our hearts, I present to you our latest Face-Off which is all about the most famous hockey-mask-wearing dude we know! And every Friday the 13th... is his birthday. So everyone, please shine up your machetes and engage in some coed skinny-dipping as we put two of Jason's later entries on the chopping block! Prepare for FRIDAY THE 13TH PART VI Vs. FRIDAY THE 13TH PART VII!

Jason
Part VI Jason gets supercharged in this one, quite literally. As he's brought back to life by 1.21 gigawatts, he emerges from his grave pissed and ready to f*ck shit up. Played by C.J. Graham, he looks buff yet svelte, like a cornerback, and wastes little time showcasing that death has not slowed him down a bit by offing Kotter's Horshack with a punch through the chest. His trek towards Crystal Lake from there is a literal death march, taking out anyone that crosses his path with the sickest of ease. He's such a bad ass killing machine, that I think this is the first time the audience can't help rooting wholeheartedly for Jason!
Part VII's Jason is now basically a full-on undead monster, brandishing skeletal bones at his back and a hardcore mean streak. He's even more buff in this one as Kane Hodder took over the duties behind the mask. However, now Jason seems to merely come off as dull hulk, offering little to no flair in the killing department. Even worse, he looks quite comical when his face is revealed, resembling a rejected creature from one of Sam Raimi's Evil Deads. Plus, he basically is no match for the tiny, telepathic girl battling him.
Hero
The horror great, Thom Matthews, does a fine job bringing us a full-on adult version of Tommy Jarvis. I don't know if the whacky way he talks, sorta with a slight speech impediment, was on purpose or not, but it works perfectly with his crazy character. His intense desire to make certain Jason is sent to hell really drives the flick. And the way he taunts his hockey-masked foe in order to get him out in the lake at the end is just epic: "Come on, Jason! Come on, you pussy!"
Lar Park-Lincoln's "Tina" is a scream queen like no other with her Carrie-esque telekinetic powers, making her a very worthy adversary for Jason. And her "wounded bird" back story really gives us a character to root for at a time when audiences were now on Jason's side. She really gives us a quite a show at the end while battling Mr. Voorhees, utilizing her mind skills to the extreme. Jason may have had the muscle, but she definitely had the brains.
Kills
The kills in Part VI are glorious, gory, and come at you at an incredible rate. Mr. Jason uses his bare hands to dish out a large sum of painful demises from head crushes to neck snaps. There are also a plethora of blunt object offings that should have spurted more copious amounts of crimson. However, the most impressive, unmatched dispatch occurs when Jason swings his trusty machete through a triple beheading! That's right! One sharp swing, three heads rolling. Impressive.
First off, if the kills in Part VII weren't so viciously editing down by the MPAA, it may have went down in history as the Jason movie with the best gruesome kills period. The gore he spills through the use of a machete, pointed objects, gas-powered garden tools, and his hands could have been so damn epic. Instead, we are mistreated to a number of careless cutaways right before any true money shots. There is one fun beating of a babe in a sleeping bag (but the uncut version was way better).
Nubile Babes
Jennifer Cooke certainly makes for a cute leading lady as do most of the other chicks in the cast. And Darcy DeMoss has a nice sex scene in an RV, yet her top is on the whole time. Actually, part VI commits the single most heinous crime in the history of Friday the 13th movies: there is NO nudity! Not one boob! Not a single butt! Not even a bra and panty shot! This is absolutely inexcusable regardless of how good this movie is!
As if it learned something from Part VI, Part VII ups the hot, naked chick quotient quite nicely. Miss Heidi Kozak is wonderfully sexy as a horny hottie who loves getting it on and going skinny dipping. And she's got one hell of an ass. Then we have the wonderfully stacked redhead, Elizabeth Kaitan, who shows us her ample bosom a number of tasty times. Wonderful! And even though she doesn't get naked, Susan Jennifer Sullivan is a bitchy blonde goddess as "Melissa".
Finale
Tommy Jarvis is waiting out in the lake on a boat, taunting Jason. He is holding onto a set of chains tied to a giant rock, surrounded by a ring of fire. The battle begins. There is something just so dramatic watching an on fire Jason duking it out with the one kid that killed him the first time. And just when it looks like Tommy has done in Jason, yet given up his own life, out comes Megan to save his ass and ram the boat's propeller right in Jason's face!
Okay, Tina and Jason go head to head in this epic telekinetic versus undead psycho battle. She's attacking him with tree branches, electrocuting him, bringing roofs down on him, and setting him on fire. Jason keeps coming. She is now cornered on the dock and he is about to strike. What does she do? Well, duh! She resurrects her dead father from the bottom of the lake, who then drags Jason down to the murky depths. Here's why this is awful: 1. We are supposed to believe that Tina's father's body was never retrieved and buried. 2. Her father has been dead at the bottom of this lake 7 years. When she resurrects him, he looks perfectly normal save for some soot marks on his face. What the f*ck?! Screw budgetary costs! If the dad doesn't look like some waterlogged zombie, the filmmakers are giving Jason fans the biggest insult since the ending of Part VIII.
Friday the 13th Part VI Jason Lives
I am so damn curious to see how many of you agree with this outcome. Part VI is a personal fave of mine, hence I clearly feel that it deserves to kick the ass of the rather poorly crafted Part VII. Jason Lives was so expertly executed with a plethora of great gore gags, self-aware humor, and fun characters. For the sixth film in a franchise, that's saying something. But what I care most about is what it says to you! Are there enough Part VII supporters out there to cry foul? I'm not gonna know unless you spit them bullets below! And feel free to send any future Face-Off ideas to me at mikecatalano@joblo.com.

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7:46PM on 09/16/2013
I agree with the outcome, but Hodder's first portrayal of Jason was superior, in my opinion....
I agree with the outcome, but Hodder's first portrayal of Jason was superior, in my opinion....
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7:03PM on 09/16/2013
Yeah I would have to agree. Jason Lives is the more entertaining film. However, none will ever beat the Final Chapter, which is the best in my eyes.
Yeah I would have to agree. Jason Lives is the more entertaining film. However, none will ever beat the Final Chapter, which is the best in my eyes.
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+0
5:53PM on 09/16/2013

...

Good call...Jason fucks way more people up in 6, plus 7 has nothing but cutaway kills. That said, 7 has Berniw Lomax sans stache and the infamous sleeping bag kill.
Good call...Jason fucks way more people up in 6, plus 7 has nothing but cutaway kills. That said, 7 has Berniw Lomax sans stache and the infamous sleeping bag kill.
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+0
5:53PM on 09/16/2013

...

Good call...Jason fucks way more people up in 6, plus 7 has nothing but cutaway kills. That said, 7 has Berniw Lomax sans stache and the infamous sleeping bag kill.
Good call...Jason fucks way more people up in 6, plus 7 has nothing but cutaway kills. That said, 7 has Berniw Lomax sans stache and the infamous sleeping bag kill.
Your Reply:



12:42PM on 09/16/2013

Jason Lives!

I agree with the outcome, but I too think Thom Matthews should win "Hero."
I agree with the outcome, but I too think Thom Matthews should win "Hero."
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12:35PM on 09/16/2013

I agree and my old friend nostalgia comes a-knocking.

Part VI is one of my favourite Friday sequels along with The Final Chapter. I just enjoyed the fact that Part VI knew it was an over the top monster/slasher movie and ran with it. It also helps that it was one of the first Jason movies I remember seeing with my father late at night on TV sometime during the late 80's (with him forbidding me to tell my mother he let me watch it). A great manic 'hero' and the ending was great. I also loved the moment he call Jason a Pussy. I did enjoy Part
Part VI is one of my favourite Friday sequels along with The Final Chapter. I just enjoyed the fact that Part VI knew it was an over the top monster/slasher movie and ran with it. It also helps that it was one of the first Jason movies I remember seeing with my father late at night on TV sometime during the late 80's (with him forbidding me to tell my mother he let me watch it). A great manic 'hero' and the ending was great. I also loved the moment he call Jason a Pussy. I did enjoy Part VII but the weak kills and the ending did let it down, but is the last one of the sequels that was a good ride. From Takes Manhattan on it all got a bit sloppy for me.
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-11
12:07PM on 09/16/2013
While I love all 10 Fridays (discounting the the atrocious Freddy vs Jason and the remake), Part 6 is THE worst next to Part 9! Random characters appear for Jason to kill that just seems like a body count fillers(paint-ballers?) The 'gags' throughout were very cheesy and in no way funny (American Express-don't leave home without it?) Only 4 camp counsellors are supposed to look after all the children and run the camp? Filled with lame ideas (bringing back Jason with a lightening bolt?) that
While I love all 10 Fridays (discounting the the atrocious Freddy vs Jason and the remake), Part 6 is THE worst next to Part 9! Random characters appear for Jason to kill that just seems like a body count fillers(paint-ballers?) The 'gags' throughout were very cheesy and in no way funny (American Express-don't leave home without it?) Only 4 camp counsellors are supposed to look after all the children and run the camp? Filled with lame ideas (bringing back Jason with a lightening bolt?) that just takes the overall series down a few notches...
As I said before I still do love Part 6!! But Part 7 is a hell of a lot better by a long shot!!!!!
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9:59AM on 09/16/2013

Part VII is the best of the series

John Carl Buecher's Jason design is the best we've ever seen the pissed off goalie. Kane Hodder's portrayal of Jason is spot on and down right intimidating. I also loved the "Carrie vs Jason" concept. I am a huge fan of part VI as well, it is my 2nd favorite in the series. I liked Mathews as Tommy Jarvis, though I would love to see Cory Feldman return to form on this character some day, given that he doesn't ham it Lost Boys 2 &3 style.
John Carl Buecher's Jason design is the best we've ever seen the pissed off goalie. Kane Hodder's portrayal of Jason is spot on and down right intimidating. I also loved the "Carrie vs Jason" concept. I am a huge fan of part VI as well, it is my 2nd favorite in the series. I liked Mathews as Tommy Jarvis, though I would love to see Cory Feldman return to form on this character some day, given that he doesn't ham it Lost Boys 2 &3 style.
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8:59AM on 09/16/2013
'Jason Lives' for me. It has the best Jason of the entire series and features *that* Alice Cooper song.
'Jason Lives' for me. It has the best Jason of the entire series and features *that* Alice Cooper song.
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-3
8:55AM on 09/16/2013

Have to disagree

For me, 5 and 6 rank among the bottom tier of Friday films. Part 6 in particular opens strong and then bottoms out with off screen kills, and lack of gore. Part 6 does get extra points for trying to go a little more gothic, but Jason in gardening gloves just doesn't do it for me!
7 is much better in terms of kills, and Jason appeal
For me, 5 and 6 rank among the bottom tier of Friday films. Part 6 in particular opens strong and then bottoms out with off screen kills, and lack of gore. Part 6 does get extra points for trying to go a little more gothic, but Jason in gardening gloves just doesn't do it for me!
7 is much better in terms of kills, and Jason appeal
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8:30AM on 09/16/2013
Tough choice but I have to go with Part VII.
Tough choice but I have to go with Part VII.
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8:04AM on 09/16/2013
Part VI is one of the best in the series, but I have a soft spot for part VII. I gotta agree with The Arrow. I love Jason's unmasked look in it. It gave me nightmares when I first saw it as a little kid.
Part VI is one of the best in the series, but I have a soft spot for part VII. I gotta agree with The Arrow. I love Jason's unmasked look in it. It gave me nightmares when I first saw it as a little kid.
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7:29AM on 09/16/2013
I agree with the outcome, but Thom Matthews was a better hero than Lar Park Lincoln IMO and I thought that Jason's look in Part 7 owned! But do agree that he looked goofy once unmasked. Good job meng!
I agree with the outcome, but Thom Matthews was a better hero than Lar Park Lincoln IMO and I thought that Jason's look in Part 7 owned! But do agree that he looked goofy once unmasked. Good job meng!
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