TV Review: Game of Thrones, Season 6, Episode 8 “No One”

Last Updated on July 31, 2021

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THE PLOT : Winter is coming, and with it, the white walkers. If those still standing don’t band together soon, the iron throne may become a throne of ice.

THE LOWDOWN: (The following column contains MAJOR SPOILERS, so I don’t recommend reading this if you haven’t watched this episode). Tonight’s episode has not only left me a tad perplexed, but rather unfulfilled. Let’s start with Riverrun shall we? What in the name of sweet f*ckballs happened there?! One second, the Blackfish is all, “We can last for two years bitches, what’chu got?” Then they let Edmure back in, who tells them to surrender, and they’re like, “You got it, boss!” Poor Brienne. That was one long ass waste of trip. Yes, I rather enjoyed the playful moment between Pod and Bronn (albeit it being a sad attempt at giving either character something to do), and I’m very happy to see Jaime and Brienne’s friendship remain intact, but seriously, what the hell was all that, besides a colossal waste of time?

What seemed like a promising night in King’s Landing, also took a quick turn for the worse. The Mountain destroying that dude was hilarious, but pointless at the same time. If you’d believed the trailers, this felt like a pivotal moment for Cersei, and with the whole “I choose violence” line, I was certainly hoping it was. Alas, it was not. I don’t think that action directly fueled the King’s ‘no more trials by combat’ bomb, but I have to say I didn’t see that one coming. This news may also upset many a fan who thought this trial would pit The Mountain against The Hound. We may very well still see that fight, but not the way people are expecting.

The most ridiculous of letdowns would have to be the events in Meereen. Now unlike some critics, I’ve read the books, and I understand the fact that most of these characters only have so much story to tell, but Christ almighty, having Tyrion, Grey Worm and Missandei sitting around sipping wine and telling jokes is terrible, mostly because it’s like the third time these three have been setup that way. C’mon guys, that’s just poor writing. And then what, an attack by the masters? Where the hell did they get a fleet? I thought no one had ships. If the masters had ships all this time, why the hell didn’t Dany take them? Because…well…you know…SHIPS ARE WHAT SHE’S NEEDED ALL ALONG! Oh, and nice of Drogon to drop Dany on the roof and leave mid siege (bad dragon!), you’d think he could have smoked a few of the bad guys before flying off to god knows where.

GAME OF THRONES SEASON 6’s eighth episode should have had much more going on than it did, which leaves me with Arya. I love Arya, she’s my girl, but for the love of god and all that’s holy, she’d better truly be done with The Many Faced God now. Last week I wasn’t sure what to make of her plight, then I convinced myself that it wasn’t her because she didn’t have needle with her (and man, did the internet go wild with conspiracy theories), but we were all wrong. It was her, and despite being stabbed nearly to death, she took out the waif chick and told Jaqen H’ghar she’s done with this joint. And what did he do? Smiled and nodded. Well damn, that was easy. The Hound gets his revenge and meets up with Baric and his crew (who coincidentally had nothing to do with the murders). Where that’s going I have no idea, but sorry internet, it’s not leading us to Lady Stoneheart. Hopefully next week gives us something to really cheer about and a battle of truly epic proportions.

SEX/NUDITY: We get a glimpse of The Hound’s sword as he’s taking a leak, and there’s some mostly nude dudes in a steam room that Arya runs through.

VIOLENCE: The Hound sure knows how to hack men to pieces, and The Mountain can tear a man’s head off like it’s no one’s business. Not sure if they’ll end up fighting, but damn would that be one messy battle.

MOST EPIC SCENE: I loved the scene with Jaime and Edmure. It was real talk, the kind of hard truth Jaime doesn’t hear very often. Hearing Jaime say the line “the things do for love” made me grin, but the whole thing was a throwback to when he was the prisoner in Rob’s camp. It was definitely a cool scene.




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