Movie Jail: This week’s defendant is…Demi Moore!

Last Updated on August 2, 2021

Movie Jail

This is Movie Jail, a unique maximum security prison that houses some of the worst writers, directors, actors and producers from Hollywood and beyond. Their crimes? The offenses vary from convict to convict but most of these inmates have contributed negatively to the film world to some capacity and his or her misdeeds have covered a long enough period of time that the authorities had to intervene. In each column a defendant is put on trial, arguments are made, and then it is up to YOU, the jury, to decide if the person is guilty or not guilty of crimes against cinema. Their lives are in your hands, dude.

The Defendant

The Case

The Prosecution: Very Good Girls, LOL, Bunraku, Happy Tears, Mr. Brooks, Bobby, Half Light, Charlie's Angels: Full Throttle, Passion of Mind, Striptease, The Juror, The Scarlet Letter, Indecent Proposal, The Seventh Sign

Ladies and gentlemen of the jury, Demi Moore was without a doubt one of the most recognizable and popular actresses in the 1980s and 1990s. Many of her performances and films were well received during that time, however two films seriously damaged her career towards the end of the 90s, and the actress really hasn't been able to recover since. Talent doesn't just disappear though, so you'd think Miss Moore would still be able to find decent work. You'd be wrong.

But even before Miss Moore's hiatus from acting in 1997 there were signs her career was heading in the wrong direction. The Scarlet Letter, The Juror and Striptease were all box office bombs, and reviews were largely negative from critics. Miss Moore was also nominated for (and won) back-to-back Razzie awards. She returned to the big screen six years later, but it was in Charlie's Angels: Full Throttle. The film was destroyed by critics, and in the prosecution's opinion, Miss Moore's performance was off. It was like someone forgot to tell the actress it wasn't a serious movie, and the prosecution feels she had the same issue in Striptease, as well as Bunraku. Does Miss Moore not know when it's OK to ham it up a bit?

In the past 10 years Miss Moore's movies have mostly been forgettable (Bobby, Happy Tears) or just plain bad (Half Light, LOL). There are many who love Mr. Brooks, but Miss Moore didn't do much in the film, and the prosecution doesn't believe her turn is the reason why people enjoyed the thriller.

Miss Moore is also known for being kind of a diva (there's a reason why her nickname at one point was "Gimme Moore"), which some may argue is one of the reasons why she hasn't been offered many great roles as of late. But there are plenty of other actors and actresses who are famous for being prima donnas, yet they still manage to find great parts and movies. Is she not worth the headache anymore? And don't try to use the fact that she's older as an excuse. You don't see Tilda Swinton or Cate Blanchett appearing in garbage like LOL.

There was a time when Miss Moore was one of the biggest stars in Hollywood, but the prosecution believes it's time we sent her ass (regardless of how sexy it still is) to Movie Jail.

The Defense: Another Happy Day, Margin Call, The Joneses, Flawless, Deconstructing Harry, G.I. Jane, If These Walls Could Talk, Disclosure, A Few Good Men, Ghost, About Last Night, St. Elmo's Fire, No Small Affair, Blame It On Rio

Ladies and gentlemen, like most actors or actresses Miss Moore has had her ups and downs, however she's still very talented, and has done some excellent (if little seen) recent work. Just because she hasn't appeared in blockbusters or award winning films lately doesn't mean my client is any less of an actress.

Part of the problem with Miss Moore is she has occasionally appeared in smaller films recently with ensemble casts, and sometimes her performances have been overlooked. The prosecution lists Bobby as one of her failures, but the defense thought she was actually quite good in that film, and she was also excellent in Margin Call. Very few people saw Another Happy Day, The Joneses or Flawless, but all three feature great work from my client, and are solid films. She's been in a few stinkers, however the defense doesn't feel Miss Moore has appeared in as many awful films as other actresses who have been brought up on similar charges. There are very few paycheck films in my client's filmography, and she doesn't mail in her performances either.

Miss Moore's break from acting (or her negative reputation) probably didn't help her career, however she also set the bar incredibly high for herself with her movies from the 80s and 90s. Ghost features one of the most memorable movie scenes ever, and A Few Good Men was a huge film at the time. G.I. Jane received mixed reviews when it was released, but it still has a very strong performance from my client, and was obviously a very physically demanding role for Miss Moore.

Miss Moore might not get the parts like she use to during her heyday, but does that mean she should go to Movie Jail? The defense doesn't believe so, and is confident that the jury will agree.


Does Miss Moore deserve Movie Jail? Do you think her recent films have been just as good as her older ones, or do you feel she's working on projects far below her talents? And why in the f*ck would she star in something like LOL with Miley Cyrus? Is Demi Moore GUILTY or NOT GUILTY?


*The cases for and against a defendant going to Movie Jail by the author are not necessarily his views and opinions but they are some of the beliefs that one would use to effectively make an argument for both sides. Not quite a devil's advocate but you get the point. Anyways, this is all in fun so don't take it too seriously. We have a separate jail for those people called "Troll Tower" and believe me you do NOT want to go there.




Last week's trial was close, but John Cusack has been found NOT GUILTY of all charges. Mr. Cusack is very lucky his two recent films The Frozen Ground and Grand Piano received decent reviews, because they pretty much saved him from being sent to Movie Jail. His older movies like High Fidelity and Say Anything… helped as well (of course) but without those two films, Lloyd Dobler would probably be sitting in a prison cell right now.


GUILTY Adam Sandler, Eddie Murphy, Vince Vaughn, Tim Burton, The Farrelly Brothers, Michael Bay, Jessica Alba, Ice Cube, Gerard Butler, Halle Berry, Marlon Wayans, Julia Roberts, M. Night Shyamalan , Katherine Heigl , Cuba Gooding, Jr. , Tyler Perry, Cameron Diaz, Kate Hudson, Ashton Kutcher, Happy Madison Productions, Jennifer Lopez, Bruce Willis, Paul W.S. Anderson, Matthew Broderick, Sarah Jessica Parker, Brett Ratner, Rob Cohen, Renee Zellweger, Shia LaBeouf, Renny Harlin, Diane Keaton, McG

NOT GUILTY Robert De Niro, Val Kilmer, Nic Cage, John Travolta, Oliver Stone, Ben Stiller, Jim Carrey, Wes Craven, Matthew McConaughey, Robert Rodriguez, Kristen Stewart, Roland Emmerich, Kevin Costner, Sandra Bullock, Hilary Swank, Al Pacino, Keanu Reeves, Kevin Smith, Channing Tatum, Jennifer Aniston, Owen Wilson, Anna Faris, Robin Williams, Charlize Theron, Ray Liotta, Jason Statham, Paul Walker, Will Smith, Salma Hayek, Michael Cera, Johnny Depp, Ryan Reynolds, Milla Jovovich, John Singleton, Jon Voight, Jack Black, Brian De Palma, Jerry Bruckheimer, Nicole Kidman, Justin Timberlake, Freddy Krueger (Halloween Special), Johnny Knoxville, Orlando Bloom, Arnold Schwarzenegger, Dan Aykroyd, Sylvester Stallone, Gavin Hood, Jason Lee, Jennifer Garner, Carrie-Anne Moss, Kate Beckinsale, John Cusack


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